The Spirit of Al-Fatiha February 14, 2006
Posted by Mujahid Mustaqim in Islam, Queer Muslims, Responses, StraightWay.trackback
BY MUJAHID MUSTAQIM
I notice that a lot of posts here recently have been responding to the Muslim homosexualists, and the words used are sometimes fairly harsh. It just occurred to me that we need to make something quite clear, especially since a commenter at The Golmal Press, which has kindly linked to us, said: “that blog you linked to doesn’t sound too sympathetic”.
I don’t think that’s a fair criticism, but a casual visitor might indeed assume that we are intolerant and unkind, even aggressive or militant. I hope that those who look deeper into the blog will find something quite different. We are indeed firm in defence of the religion, and for principles we view as crucial for successful society. But we recognise the reality of same-sex attractions for many Muslims, and respect those who are struggling for the sake of God.
What about the others? We do believe in the “live and let live” principle as a way of getting along in society, but that doesn’t mean overlooking what is clearly sinful according to Islam, let alone changing our beliefs to “suit the changing times”. No, we just say that our duty is to inform and advise, and whenever people distort the truth or call to wrongdoing, we will stand in opposition to them and do our best to correct their errors and lies.
When I first heard about the existence of the “gay Muslim” groups, I was as shocked as anyone else. But I went beyond that shock and chose to read whatever I could find about them online. Then I decided that there should be at least one group, or at least one website, dedicated to responding to their misconceptions.
Among the people the Muslims (and their scholars) must address are those who, facing the trial of same-sex attractions and finding no sound advice in the mainstream, have fallen into the trap of these deviant groups. Once in, any notion of reform is quickly beaten out of them. (I don’t suggest that physical torture is used, but strangely enough, Al-Fahisha people have indirectly suggested that we do stuff like that!!)
So while being firm and even harsh against the insincere propagandists who mislead others from the path, and spread the fitnah of homosexuality (as a ‘lifestyle’) into the Muslim community, we should also be soft on those who, while perhaps being part of the groups, have open minds and hearts ready to receive guidance – and we ask Allah to grant us guidance from Him.
Below is an article I wrote right back at the beginning, in 2002. It reflects my earliest thoughts on the issue, and I still like to look back at it. Hopefully my understanding has evolved a lot since then. Basically it is a reflection on Surah al-Fatiha, based on a tafseer article by Sheikh Salman al-Oadah.
THE SPIRIT OF AL-FATIHA
By Mujahid Mustaqim
The StraightWay Foundation
“In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
Praise be to Allah, the Cherisher and Sustainer of the worlds;
Most Gracious, Most Merciful;
Master of the Day of Judgment.
You alone do we worship, and from You alone we seek help.
Guide us to the Straight Way,
The Way of those on whom You have bestowed Your Grace, not of those who have earned Your anger nor of those who go astray.”
Thus reads the first chapter of the Holy Qur’an, Al-Fatihah, meaning “The Opening” (of the Book). It has various titles, including “The Mother of the Qur’an”, “The Chapter of Praise” and “The Glorious Recital”. Its seven verses are also known as “The Seven Oft-repeated” because they are recited several times in each of the five daily prayers of Muslims, and their meaning is reiterated throughout the Qur’an.
A different story online
Sadly, if one does an internet search for “Al-Fatiha”, it is very likely that a certain organisation’s website will come up as the top result. The Al-Fatiha Foundation was established by Faisal Alam in the USA in 1998, and since then has grown in profile, and now has various branches around the world, including one in London, UK. This group promotes the idea of the “Gay Muslim” and tries to reconcile homosexual lifestyles with Islam.
In future articles, we shall discuss exactly what “Al-Fatiha” says, but it would be useful to look briefly at that subject now. According to their leader, “Al-Fatiha does NOT argue that gay muslims should practice homosexuality!” However, even in their using the term “gay Muslims”, they are playing a dangerous game. They do not accept that the Qur’an and Sunnah are clear in their condemnation of sodomy (homosexual acts), and they promote the idea that Muslims should accept homosexuality as being an alternative way of life. Besides these official statements, their mailing lists and discussion boards are full of confused people and liars trying to bring the Shari’ah (Allah’s law) in line with their own desires rather than aligning their own behaviour with divine guidance.
Quite why the group has called itself “Al-Fatiha” is not clear. In short, it is named after the glorious surah quoted above, and is supposed to represent some sort of “Opening” or a way forward for these supposedly forward-thinking Muslims. The reality, however, is that they have lost the meaning of the words of Surah Al-Fatihah.
True understanding of the Surah
The same chapter contains a motto for another organisation, called The StraightWay Foundation. The name comes from the sixth verse, “Guide us to the Straight Way”. The verse is rich and full of meanings and inspiration for any believer who trusts in Allah and strives to please Him. Here are a few aspects to consider:
1. The Straight Way is to obey Allah’s commandments and avoid what He has prohibited.“…We have made the (Qur’an) a Light, wherewith We guide such of Our servants as We will; and verily you guide to a Straight Way: the Way of Allah, to Whom belongs whatever is in the heavens and whatever is on earth…” [42:52-3]
2. “Guide us on the Straight Way” means “Strengthen us in guidance and increase our faith”. It is also an appeal for increase in knowledge, insight and understanding.
3. Truly being on the Straight Way means being aware of what Allah wishes (i.e. what He commands and prohibits) at every given time and in every situation. All of this life is a test, which requires constant awareness and careful choice of courses of action.
4. Not only must we know what Allah wishes, but we must also have a strong desire to follow this, as opposed to our carnal desires and the whispered suggestions of the Shaytaan (Satan).These concepts are all part of our struggle as Muslims, and our philosophy at the StraightWay Foundation. We strive to please Allah in every action, to carry out what He has commanded and to avoid and shun what He has prohibited. We trust His guidance as being the unique truth about the correct way of life for success in this world and the next. These beliefs are what we remind our Muslim brothers and sisters of, and invite others to adopt.
Living the Straight Way!
Of course, nowadays the word “straight” has an additional definition. It is a colloquial term for “heterosexual”, and although we do not take this as an evidence that our opinions are correct, the fact that the “Straight Way” is the “Heterosexual Way” is backed up by this terminology! We believe that Allah has given us natural instincts to fulfil His wishes, even though some people are more susceptible to certain misguidance (from Satan) than others.
A person who is affected by lust towards members of the same sex has several choices. He or she could carry out those urges to the full – or have a sexual relationship without crossing the final “boundary” – or “come out” as a “gay Muslim” but without any relationship – or turn to pornography and un-Godly discussion with people of similar inclination.
None of these is the Straight Way.
Only by following Allah’s commands – evident in the Creation, detailed in the Qur’an (and Sunnah), and understood and explained by qualified scholars – can we hope to live a fruitful life and enjoy a blissful afterlife. “Fear Allah as much as you can, and listen and obey..” [64:16] We will be judged based on our efforts and how much we strive in this life to fulfil Allah’s commands.
This is “The Way of those on whom [Allah] bestowed [His] Grace” – the way of the Prophets, the pious, the martyrs and the righteous. We ask Allah again to guide us on this Straight Way!
The other two ways
“…not of those who have earned Your anger nor of those who go astray.”
These other two categories deserve some elaboration in this context too. Who are the ones who have earned Allah’s anger? Scholars mention that among these are people who know the truth but abandon it. There are many from the “homosexual” camp who fall under this category today. Sadly, many people prefer to follow their desires and lusts rather than seek refuge in the All-Knowing, to Whom we will all return to account for our deeds.
Why are these people mentioned before “those who go astray”? Scholars say that it is because they are in a far more condemned position. At least straying people can be given knowledge that will bring them back to the Straight Way. If, however, they are straying because of their vain desires, then returning from error and repenting is a much more difficult matter.
We believe that most “gay Muslims” fall into the latter category, and are astray. In the face of powerful and compelling propaganda, it is difficult for a young person to realise the truth, especially when so many religious leaders fail to explain the issue of homosexuality in an informed, sensitive and caring manner.
This is where the StraightWay Foundation sees its main role. Our intention is to bring this issue to light under the banner of the Qur’an and Sunnah and with reference to the works of reputable, qualified scholars. We ask Allah to guide us on His Straight Way, increase us in faith and knowledge, and give us the desire and ability to act on this in the way that is most pleasing to Him and beneficial for the Muslims and the world.
Eye on 'Gay Muslims' 
Great article, Mr Mujahid….I may be the one that went the wrong way if i did not stumble on the straightway site, your writing does make sense and keep me in the straightway…keep it up…may Allah bless you
ima gay muslim and im from bosnia i came to usa 2005 but whole my life since i know for myself beeing a human bean i knew i was gay and i tryed to ignore it bu it didnt work
my life was very hard i survive the war for 4 year i had 99% chance to be death i used to eat grass and paper to survive and now with my personal life that i go throught is very hard worse than a war
i wisited some web sites like http://straightway.sinfree.net/updates.htm
and i think its bullshit i dont think you people OUR BROTHERS understands us
i read and read the adevance
and only thing i see is
IN MY OPPINION
I THINK
I SUGGEST
YOU SHOULD
AND I THINK AGAIN AND AGAIN
AND ON AND ON
thats some shit saome serious shit you guys dont understands us you dont know how is to live in this skin the only you know is to say
i think????
WTF???
thx all
but for all this
its a challenge from a GOD to you
peace
I am also Bosnian and gay… Life isn’t easy but I’m not leaving Islam just because the unacceptance towards us.
U are not a Muslim if u commit homosexual acts
Listen you are not a muslim if you are a gay. If you are attracted to men but have commited no homosexual acts then you are a good muslim. If you havent dont, think of Allah SWT remember what he did to the people of lut(as) that could be you. Fear god leave this kufr beg allah for forgiveness and inshallah he will forgive you for he is the most beneficient the most merciful and the all knower of that which is seen and unseen.
Peace be upon u
@Mustapha Radiy. Please don’t tell someone that they are not Muslim if they are gay unless you are God. God decides who is Muslim and who is not and not your interpretation of what is haram or not.
Adi, salam ‘alaikum… I’m sorry that you haven’t found our articles helpful, though I would certainly say that the content of the (very out-of-date) website doesn’t give a full picture of the kind of support we are giving to many people, especially in our e-mail group, plus via this new blog.
I can’t imagine what horrors you’ve gone through with the war, and maybe can’t imagine the other difficulties either. But in this StraightWay group are plenty of people who have gone through much of the same, and maybe worse. Over time, we have shared, listened and learned, and so I think that we are not speaking from ignorance.
OK, so you don’t like when we say “I think”. Well I won’t apologise for at least having the humility to say when I am not certain about something. The “queer Muslims” declare their “sexual orientation” with certainty, then try to reinterpret the Qur’an based on this “reality”! Then they have the cheek to say that *we* are too certain of ourselves!
There are lots of difficult questions to explore here, and nobody can claim to have the easy answers. What I am 100% sure about is that Islam provides the answers, if we are sincere enough to look, and trust in Allah to help us. And added to that, we need your help too. Please tell us more details about what it is that we “don’t understand”. Then we can know, and we can help more people.
But your understanding of Islam isn’t 100% so you are picking and choose quote and judging. at the beginning of this article, you also quoted Al Fatihah: “You alone do we worship, and from You alone we seek help” which means the only Absolute is Alloh and the only Absolute book is Qur’an, but yet you are making your own laws through Sunnah and Hadists . How are these “reputable, qualified scholars” have the “special” rights to make Islamic laws? How are they somehow have the higher degree than the reset of us muslims??? I don’t think so.. even Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) himself followed and preached ONLY the Quran. [49:13] O people, we created you from the same male and female, and rendered you distinct peoples and tribes, that you may recognize one another. The best among you in the sight of GOD is the most righteous. GOD is Omniscient, Cognizant. So no.. neither you, me, or these “reputable, qualified scholars” have the right to makes up laws!
Now.. can we go back to Qur’an? and please revisit your interpretation on Qur’an.. because as the Prophet said Islam is for people who think.. so we need to try harder understanding the complexity of this issue. Why? It is easy for us to pick and choose quotes and half true things to legitimate your opinion, but people like these two Bosnian brothers and worse, they are facing life and death consequences. Do you want to have the blood of your brothers and sisters on your hand for your misunderstanding? I absolutely do not want that! and it is not my place to make judgement.. not yours either.. only GOD. Let’s go back to Qur’an.. Qur’an never speak on homosexuality… It doesn’t even have a word for it, it does refers to certain acts, and these are open to interpretation: (7:80, 27:54) Lewdness, indecency, gross.
(21:74) Improper
(11:78) Evil
And the story of Lot isn’t about sexual orientation.. it does condemn sexual aggression; rape, etc.
Muslims who rush to judge and punish others should remember that everyone will need to answer for their actions on the Day of Judgment.
I am assuming you mean well.. so please go back to the true teaching of Islam.. promotes the Islamic values of peace, social justice and tolerance; free from prejudice and discrimination against all Muslims including our LGBT brothers and sisters.
May Allah Protect us from Homosexuality, subhnallah a whole nation was destroyed, No nation was ever destroyed like the people of lut and yet they say that the quran is not clear in regards to homosexuality. People need to fear Allah and leave this evil ways of the sodomites. May Allah guide us and and bring these misguided homosexuals to Islam….Listen to brother Mujahid he is calling you to the haqq……Wassalam
Brother no
The act of homosexuality is punished with death this is clear sodomites make their choice they are responsible for it there is virtually no scientific basis as to gays being born gay
Is it true that when they raided and killed Osama bin Laden they found a whole heap of hidden porn movies. Such hypocrites do exist u know. What is the punishment for such a person. It was in the news when it happened and it was very obvious they weren’t making it up because it was live. God forbid if I would be one of those.
I don’t know if that’s true, or just another propaganda piece. What’s important is our own sincerity with Allah, and making our private lives just as righteous – or more so – than our public appearance.
What I don’t understand is how can homosexuality be sinful if homosexuals are born with being attracted (physically and emotionally) to the same sex. It’s not like I decided at one point in adulthood, “hey, let me try being gay”. I was born liking the same sex. To say that homosexuality is sinful is to say Allah made me with the intent of making me a sinner, and that’s simply not true. We are all born pure and innocent muslims, and I find it hard to think that Allah would give me and other LGBT individuals an unfair disadvantage to living a righteous life by making us feel and act out “sinful” behaviour since the day we were born.
Omar, we don’t say that “homosexuality” (this invented category) is sinful. If you mean the attractions, then those are not sinful in themselves. What matters are our actions, which are indeed a choice.
If – for the sake of argument – it’s true that someone is “born liking the same sex”, then we see this as a test from Allah. As for understanding how Allah tests His slaves, that is part of the struggle every believer faces.
As a struggling straight Muslim, you have to understand the importance of the questions that Omar is asking. Why does Islam condemn the ‘act’ of homosexuality while facilitating ways to fulfill heterosexual desires (i.e. marriage)? Why does Allah choose to test some people more than others? How can we be sure that we’re being true to Islam without being unjust to people, who as you say, ‘are being tested’?
These are genuine questions, and I really do hope you can answer them. Even I can’t wrap my head around the apologist version of the story of the people of Lot without ignoring some very pointed Hadith.
No no no my friend
This is not true for if a man or woman is born gay then Allah would not be just and he is truly the most just and merciful. For homosexuals will be comitted to the fires of hell and god judges only those who are in controll of their actions. How can god send gays to hell if he created them gay.
So are you saying that heterosexuals (aka those who are attracted to the opposite sex and carry out sexual actions with them) are entitled to express their love and affection for one another, while LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender) individuals are deemed to live a life of isolation towards love (love that intimate lovers share)? That’s not fair. Why would Allah do that? Are we not all entitled to love and companionship. The “sinner” (person who does the action of same sex relations) has a choice of being with a partner (as a man and a woman would be together) or to be with someone of the opposite sex when they do not care the same way for them as they would for someone of the same sex. The latter is what I like to call “deceit”, also a sin. But if they do not marry or are in a relationship with the opposite sex, then we go back to them being isolated. It doesn’t seem logical to me that it is a test. When we don’t understand something, we all of a sudden label it a “test”. I would be fine with it being written in the Qur’an somewhere saying something along the lines of, “…and if you are attracted to someone of the same sex, know this is a test…”, but same sex relations mentioned in it is so unclear and subjective. Some people are indeed “born liking the same sex” and it is true, as I am an example of that someone, as well as many others (research it). It is a sin to lie, and for me to make such a statement without knowing for a fact that it is true, would indicate that I’m a lier, but I don’t expect you or anyone else who doesn’t fully understand same sex relations to believe me. Those who are not homosexuals (an “invented category” to make it easier to identify a particular group) simply don’t understand certain things, despite “enlightening” or “explaining” them on the subject. By no means am I trying to show any kind of dislike towards you, I’m just telling you what I know to be true.
Let’s keep going with the “born with it line..” babies of drug addicted mothers often are born addicted to drugs themselves. They can be(and usually are) treated. Why, then, can we not say that these babies can grow up doing drugs from an Islamic perspective since they were born addicted to them out of no fault of their own?
I repeat there is no basis for being born gay
Also it comtradicts the theology of islam and gods judgement on man if it were true
Brother Mustafa, Please do not be like Christian priest , when Galileo said that world is round, they harassed him..Do you think He/she problem they made themself…..They are born with. Gays have only psycological problem…Better you consult with the Doctors aswell before you commend on Medical issues….and there is a solution in Quran and Hadith for that…….Right hand possess…..it can be male too…..
There are other options besides “born with it” and “made it themselves”. And no, please don’t impose on the Qur’an and hadith the idea that people can engage sexually with same-sex slaves – who ever understood or applied it like that?
I don’t quite understand the statement you made. It is widely known that pregnant women need to take precautions to ensure the delivery of a healthy baby; this includes not taking harmful drugs during pregnancy (as it can lead to the birth of a child with an unhealthy addiction to drugs). Whatever the mother puts in her body affects the child. So no, I don’t think it’s the child’s fault at all, because they were born with the addiction as a result of an irresponsible/troubled mother, not through nature. Drugs are bad for you because they cause harm to your body, such as alcohol. This is why we (Muslims) are forbidden to put these things in our bodies. By having same-sex relations, you are not causing any harm (nothing different that you can get from opposite-sex relations). If you are familiar with psychology, then you know that some addictive behaviours can be treated through a process (human behaviour modification). We’ve seen it done to drug addicts, with success. We’ve seen it done to homosexuals by organizations that try to make them “straight”, with no success. Why? Because it’s not an addiction. It’s like a heterosexual going through a process into liking the same-sex. It’s not possible. Homosexuality is not a drug, nor is it an addiction, thus it is not something that needs to be treated. If homosexuality is a “sin”, it would definitely be very clearly stated in the Qur’an. But it isn’t. It’s all subjective. It is not clearly stated like how the statement, “Allah is the Almighty” or how the instructions on how to live a righteous life (such as the 5 pillars of Islam) are so clearly stated and are indisputable.
Just to correct a part of my argument:
“So no, I don’t think it’s the child’s fault at all, because they were born with the addiction as a result of an irresponsible/troubled mother — The act of putting harmful substances (carried out by the mother) into her body causes the unnatural state of the child. Just for arguments sake, say there is something women are putting in their bodies during pregnancy that make an individual born being gay, then it is not the gay individuals’ fault. You wouldn’t tell a mentally disabled person they will go to hell because they were born being incapable to carry out God’s expectations. Same thing, if someone is, from the start, attracted to the same same as heterosexuals are, from the start, attracted to the opposite sex, how can they be blamed for it and be told they will go to hell, simply because of something they cannot control. Then you would say, “well, actions can be controlled”. Yes, they can, but then you live a depressing life of isolation. Allah wants us to live a wonderful life while following the expectations that are carried out in the Qur’an, and I don’t think one of these expectations include, “you have to be straight, even if you don’t feel anything for the opposite sex”.
I think you missed the point of my post. Saying that someone is born with something does not make that particular action OK. The Qur’an and the sunnah are clear and not “subjective” when it comes to stating that same-sex encounters are forbidden in Islam (this website has several posts on the topic also read mainstream Islamic texts ont he topic). The Qur’an and sunnah are also clear that only sexual relations between a man and a woman through marriage are allowed (also with “slaves” which are no longer relevant in our day and age as Islam was working to eradicate slavery at a time when it was still norm). As for your assumption of “living a depressing life in isolation” again I know of many cases where this is not the case – people, myself included, who live life according to Islam the best they can and who are not depressed nor isolated as a result of their choices.
It’s not an assumption. It’s a fact. But I think this is where I’m going to stop. I misunderstood what the mission of this site was about. By no means do I show negativity towards it, I respect your opinions and hope you provide help for those seeking it from you guys.
By stating that it is a fact then you have to show that there is no negative case to your assumption and I am explaining to you that my experience has not been what you stated and I know many many others in the same boat therefore it’s an ASSUMPTION which is not correct. Maybe it can be classified as an opinion but definitely not a fact.
Omar not to sound harsh but the Quran clearly states in the Arabic version the insertion in anus which was committed by people of Sodom as a major sin. Also there are verses which say that you prefer men over women truly you have trangessed. And I’m not making this up. My understanding nobody is born gay or straight and there is no sexual orientation only that which is right and wrong. I have grown up in an environment where homosexuality was rampant in my childhood years and I sincerely regret those years not because my mom and dad were telling me they were liberals but instinctively. As a result while I get attracted to both men and women I know it is wrong for me to pursue a man because I am a male. The main point is if I were told that eating chicken is haram and told at s time when I was addicted to it I would try my best to avoid it after I have gained the knowledge. Think of this issue in this manner there are people who consume only vegetables and are naturally resistant to chicken and thus are not fat. I on the other hand love it but if God has decreed that it is not allowed so what do I do..do iI directly go against God’s wish and fulfill my desire or go through the painful process of accepting God’s decision. The origin story of prophet Adam ended up in earth pretty much sums it up- God tells you not to eat the apple-satan tempts you to break the rule in addition to your own desire to eat the delicious apple. So this is the question I ask of gays – do you want to risk eternity for short term benefit or take the hard path some of Muslims ourselves have chosen to uphold God decision!
Salam, I’m happy that this sight exists. I’ve been struggling with my homosexual tendencies for years (by that I mean not acting on it). I’m 29 now and it’s getting more and more difficult because I long for a romantic connection with someone. I cannot seek any support because of how the Islamic community “attacks” homosexuals verbally. This is why I very much respect this sight for realizing that there are homosexual muslims out there and some of us are choosing to “fight” the urges. A little support can go a long way…. I do, however, understand what Omar is saying here that by choosing not to act on it would mean a lonely life (without a partner). No one to have that emotional and physical connection with – which every human needs (it’s part of our nature). I also agree with Omar that we were born this way, we never woke up one day and thought “I want to be with a woman (or a man)”. I find it very offensive when people use the words “disgusting” or “not natural” because I can go and say well a man and a woman together is “disgusting” and “not natural” from my point of view. And if this isn’t what God intended, then why did He create us with these feelings. Or at least make us bisexual rather than Lesbian or Gay that way we would have a choice….. Also the argument that homosexuals were conditioned or a product of the environment is not true (at least in my point of you). I’ve lived an Islamic life, my family is all practicing and I’ve been wearing Hijab (of my own choice) since university… And I’ve only met one other homosexual who was in high school with me and I only knew him through acquaintances. how is me being a lesbian a product of my environment? I have also had many men interested in marriage and I’ve given many chances to feel something for them but I cannot marry a man and live a lie – it doesn’t seem fair. My family doesn’t know by the way, and my father is not pushing me to marry. He says that when the right man comes, I’ll know….
Although the reasonings given as to why homosexuality is haram do not make sense to me, and may never make sense to me nor to many other homosexuals- I have to trust that Allah is all knowing and sees what we do not see. I’ll put my faith in Him and may He Guide us all onto the straight path….. Now saying this is easier than living it but I will continue struggling. Thank you again for developing this sight.
Ramadan Mubarak,
Layla
This is the first time i have visited this website. I am a 29 year old man and i have never been attracted to women. Everything that Omar says is exactly how i feel. Without repeating all the comments, i have wondered everyday if for me this means growing old alone? While all my friends have relationships and marriages? I do not have a definitive opinion on this but at times i feel like i was born this way and would not be penalized for my inclinations, other times i feel it is wrong and i must fight this. I guess all im saying is im glad a website exists where i have been able to see other muslims who are going through the same thing and that all these thoughts are not mine alone.
assalamu alaikum ,i am 30year old gay but married with women for the force of my mother ,i lost my father before 4 yrs.i read quraan,i getup early for subha morning prayer then i do 5 times pyrayer.now i work in saudi.i please please tell me how to come out from this same sex attraction ,even i cannot give love to my wife,please tell me any suurah in quran or there is no way to come out from gay life.i pray even kghit pyrayer tajuud but still i am a gay i cry lot in prayer but i am asking is there any medicine for this same sex .its haraam in muslim. but please today the time came i have to live my wife as i first time visited this site please help me .
Wa ‘alaikum as-salam brother, I feel for you and am praying for you. The first struggle is to stay away from what Allah has forbidden. The second struggle is to do whatever possible to defeat those desires and solve whatever issues lie behind them. This is not only a spiritual matter (in which prayers and good deeds definitely help), but may involve speaking to a trustworthy professional counsellor who can help you through your problems. You may benefit from discussing with others with similar experiences who could offer advice, by visiting http://www.straightstruggle.com.
I feel sorry for you brother tell me have you committed any homosexual acts?
If not then it’s all in your mind homosexuality is a choice it is not genetic any who say so are stupid.
Good luck
I believe that Islam is the only major religion that punishes homosexual behavior with death. The Christians don’t, the Jews don’t Buddhists believe it to be a karmic condition, that just leaves you. While I applaud the softer approach, it saddens me that while being gay is so widely practiced in Muslim countries being caught means torture, imprisonment and death. How is that merciful?
While I know that some Muslim countries punish same-gender sexual intercourse with death, where in the Qur’an does it say that we, as Muslims, should do that?
On that note, just because Muslim countries punish a certain thing, does that automatically mean that it is forbidden in Islam and that we should do the same? JAK.
Eric, even if that is a factual statement, I’m not sure what point it is supposed to make, other than that one religion should follow other communities’ actions rather than its own epistemology – which is absurd, as Islam is based upon the Qur’an and Sunnah, whereas we were warned from taking the path of those who have earned divine displeasure and gone astray!
As for what Muslim countries do, that is a separate question from what Islam says. But, contrary to Noni’s implication, yes such actions are certainly forbidden in Islam and saying so – as well as taking actions to stop the spread of such behaviour in the society – is ultimately merciful even though its basis is justice according to guidance of scripture.
Noni…..Also note that Muslim Contries Allow Banking and Insurance companies, while Interest is forbidden in Islam…They respect Banking employees while they look down on Gays……
Hello Eric,Kindly note that i went to Makkah and reported to the Imams that I am a Gay. They did not killed me nor even treat me badly……If anybody has done that they are uneducated …..People of the Lut were disbelievers and they did Anal sex, that is the reason God punished them.Anal sex is prohibited for even heterosexuals………………The most important in Islam is the Belief and following major principles and restrictions…..Sexuality problem is not a Major problem in Islam..
I read the article carefully, yet I would not recommend any brother fighting with homosexual urgences to matty a woman. My husband is struggling with same sex attractions. We are married for almost fifteen years, which are full of pain and suffering. There is no way to “pray gayness away”, no fasting, no Que´an recitation can remove it. My husband didn´t tell me what is going on until lately. I spend many nights crying alone as my husband did not want to touch me and I never attracted him. Instead he was blaming me for being too sexual if I tried to get close to him at the start of our marriage. The distance is not only sexual but also emotional. We have kids, but this life is full of pain. My wholw life was sacrified for someone else´s “trying to lead normal life”. I will never be loved the way other women are, my kids will never have a happy family. Is this what Allah wanted?
Sister, was your marriage an arragnged marraige? I can understand any couple having this problem (spouse identifying themself as gay or not) as it has more to do with the issue of love. I’d love to help, I just would like more info.
Oh to my last reply
If u commit homosexual acts then my comment above was to you if not then disregard it however if you are gay u are not a muslim
Also to Eric
Christianity does and Judaism does read the new and old testaments and you will see that sodomising dogs (gays) are punished by stoning read it
Dear Moidin………….. I recognised my problem when I was a teenager. I was a religious person too.I consulted the Psychiatrist from that time itself and went through many therapies . I also prayed to Allah with my level best.I studied Genetics in the college.He/she is a genetical problem.They have both physical and mental problems.For Gays only psycological problems.It is not like drug addiction.That is the reason North American Psychiatrist and Psycologist consider it as natural. Now I am 50 years..there no changes to Homosexual feelings.Thanks to Allah , though my Mother and relatives pushed me a lot for Marriage, it did not happen. Now I found a solution from the Quran. In Surah Muminun Verses 5/6 And those who guard their Chastity ,Except from their wives or that their right hand possess. The meaning of slave for the right hand possess is given by the scholars, not by the Prophet (p.a).Slavery is abolished by the Prophet (p.a).So if we take the word Right hand possess, it can be male also .If we do the propagational work , we can get right hand possess as war booty under Jihad .I did istikara prayer for this purpose .So we can have male partners. But no Anal sex .Do not take the literal meaning of holy war for jihad. Its objective is to invite Mankind to Islam. Offcourse we can fight with our tounge and there is defencive war aswell……The Major problem of the people of the Lut was disbelief. After Prophet Mohammed (p.a) war booty became lawful to us.
I heard of ijtihad (new scholarly understandings based on deep learning, penetrating insight and lengthy efforts), but doing istikhara to make up new religious rulings?! That’s funny!!
Brother Mustafa and those scholars who have commented against Gays with regards to Quran,please make sure whether you people follow averything according to Quran. Interest(Riba)is Haram as per Quran. On what basis of Quran and Hadith you people deal with Bank and Insurance companies ? Gays are helpless due they are born with this problems.And there is a solution for this in the Quran and Hadith for this problems.
Please do not take the Chair of Allah with your little knowledge. Allah is the final Judge. For your information Allah has admitted a Jewish Prostitute in to the Paradise for being mercyful to a thirsty Dog and Adimitted Scholars in to Hell also.
Imams are enjoying your life with Laxurious Houses , Cars, Family life with Insurances and Banking facilities, while we poeple are struggling with our problems..and Harassing and killing us for our helplessness……………..You have to answer to Allah for this………………
im laughing so hard. you literally used an english translation of a surah ‘guide us to a straight way’ to say it’s means straight ppl for five whole point. this was so pitiful. i feel so bad for you and your attempt to pass a judgement that you clearly shouldn’t be doing.
It is nobody’s problem but yours if you can’t read or understand the article in full.